Thursday, September 26, 2013
The future of healing
I normally don't like to post video or audio links, but I thought I'd make an exception this time to show the best way I know how families can support recovery and become fierce advocates for our relatives. See the link below. While you're at it, check out more of Dr. Breggin's interviews. He's not just that guy who warns about the dangers of psychiatric drugs.
This is the future of healing. My guest Jennifer Maurer is
Managing Director of Mother Bear: Families for Mental Health–the good family support network that is
helping families heal together with respect and empathy for all. Learn about
MotherBearCan.org. You may want to participate or to support this incredibly
forward-looking nonprofit network of caring human beings.
Tuesday, September 24, 2013
Taxidermy as an alternative therapy
One of my favorite humor blogs is NAMI Dearest, the laboratory creation of a certifiably mad genius. Somehow I missed this latest post.
As leaders in mental illness advocacy and policy, we devote the weight of our enormous moral authority and hand-wringing sob stories to the advancement of best practices in mental health care. Some of these best practices include fewer patient privacy rights, lower civil commitment standards, forced psychiatric drugging and ECT, as well as the progressive Assisted Outpatient Suicide program, otherwise known as The Permanent Solution.
But how do we handle the grief of losing our loved ones once the treatments have cured their genetically transmitted, psychiatric brain diseases?

Yes, there is always Zoloft. But in addition to chemically numbing the symptoms of Grief Disorder, many NamiDearests are finding Taxidermy Therapy to be an effective adjunct to their personal recovery regimen.
Read the rest here
Preserve Those Cherished Memories…and Your Loved One, Forever!
Posted on August 30th, 2013
Who better understands your frustration with non-compliant mentally ill
family members than we do here at NamiDearest?
As leaders in mental illness advocacy and policy, we devote the weight of our enormous moral authority and hand-wringing sob stories to the advancement of best practices in mental health care. Some of these best practices include fewer patient privacy rights, lower civil commitment standards, forced psychiatric drugging and ECT, as well as the progressive Assisted Outpatient Suicide program, otherwise known as The Permanent Solution.
But how do we handle the grief of losing our loved ones once the treatments have cured their genetically transmitted, psychiatric brain diseases?
Yes, there is always Zoloft. But in addition to chemically numbing the symptoms of Grief Disorder, many NamiDearests are finding Taxidermy Therapy to be an effective adjunct to their personal recovery regimen.
Read the rest here
Monday, September 23, 2013
All over the map, but not really
Chris (and therefore, I) has had an emotional few months. Let's
see. It started with his breaking up with "Jenny," back in July. His
decision, not hers. A decision which had all the appearances of being taken for
the right reason but a decision he immediately regretted. For someone who has
spent a lifetime avoiding decision-making, I was thrilled that at least he had
made one. I was not so thrilled that he immediately began to second guess
himself. But, no matter, after an intense week of taking his own pulse and
talking to people who would listen, he righted his sails. I'm pleased that he
is finally getting around to taking a stand, on something! I loaded him up with
lots of books on boundary issues, and I pointed out that he tends to have rather
fluid boundaries and anybody can invade his space. "You've got to know
your limits," I counsel him, "and respect them." He can
also invade other people’s boundaries by being too caring. He can’t assume that
other people want his help or sympathy.
The decision to no longer see Jenny lasted
no more than a month and now they seemed to be locked in an on-again/off again
thing. Not my business, except that Chris wants to talk to me about it, so,
reluctantly, I've been dragged in, despite my protests that his relationships
are his business. I've had a few rough sleeps that have actually had me praying
for morning to come. If I step back from the drama of it all, using
"conscious refocusing," I can truthfully say that Chris may be going
through a rough patch, but he is learning to take risks, to make decisions, and
to live the consequences of his decisions. He is maturing.
Having a girlfriend has prompted him to
realistically assess his marital prospects. His future earning ability is not
promising, at this time. Here's where we get around to discussing the need to
go back to school to prepare for entry into the job market. "If you would
like a future with Jenny or anyone else, Chris," isn't it time you
got real about your education?" I think he may be finally getting the
point.
Necessity, the mother of invention.
Friday, September 20, 2013
Getting to know you
Knowing a little bit about his
personal number 3 has helped my son, Chris, get a clearer understanding
of who he is and what he was put on earth to do. Learning that he is a number 3 has helped me better appreciate Chris’s
strengths and the areas where he may struggle a bit. The ancient Chinese astrology,
Nine Star Ki, digs a little deeper, using three numbers associated with the
atmospheric conditions present on the day, month, and year of one’s birth. It
is based on the observed cycles of nature ( life force “ki”), which are nine
year cycles comprising smaller cycles of nine months and even smaller cycles of
nine days.
Numbers and astrology can be especially
important to people who have experienced a prolonged mental health crisis.
I believe cycles of nine resonate at the vibrational "gut" level, complementing compassionately spoken and intuitive words. Recently I had the pleasure of enrolling in the online Recovering Our Families course.
One of the first reading assignments was authored by psychologist and activist Pat Deegan, and included the following quote:
"The goal of recovery is to
become the unique, awesome, never to be repeated human being that we are called
to be."
Determining the awesomeness of who we
are and who we are meant to be is never an easy task, and one that is
particularly hard for people who have been diminished – physically,
emotionally, and spiritually – by a lengthy mental health problem.
It’s not just the person experiencing
the crisis who has been diminished – families empathy for, and expectations of,
the person have also taken a grave hit. Many of us are more used to seeing
violent and angry outbursts from our relative, silly or naive behavior,
dependency, apathy, lack of self-confidence. We adopt a vocabulary of despair.
The course encourages the participants
to try to consider ourselves or our relative in a different light, to see
strengths instead of focusing on deficits.
We call our newfound attitude
“conscious refocusing.” The course got us all started by giving us practical
examples what it looks like to focus on strengths when the habitual response
might be the opposite.
Example: "He is alone and
isolated" becomes "He is an
individual who has a rich inner life and follows his own path."
But, here’s the thing. Knowing the
numbers will bolster any flagging conviction you may hold that you or your
relative is beyond hope. It will bring you further down the road of practicing
recovery and helping you or your relative become that awesome, never to be repeated, human being.
Chris’s numbers are an instantly
recognizable portrait of himself, and believe me, he is unique and awesome. He
is a quiet presence, a deep thinker, who has a great need to serve humanity. He
is a skilled manager, and a hard worker, something I had almost lost sight of about him. The early
stages in particular of his crisis made me forget that he was once
well-organized. He is extremely capable today, assuming charge of household chores
while taking on more managerial volunteer jobs.
My middle son Alex’s numbers are a recognizable portrait, too, of
an awesome, never to be repeated, individual. Had Alex been the one who
underwent a mental health crisis, I’ve always thought that he would be a less
gentle presence than Chris. We would have had many violent altercations, until
we learned how to work together. His numbers do not lie. Amongst his other
attributes, Alex’s numbers reveal that he doesn’t like being told what to do.
Duh! I’ve known that since he was a toddler. Properly channeled, being aggressive and not taking crap from anyone,
is a positive thing, an entrepreneurial skill, but there is also a less
positive side. The numbers also reveal where Alex goes when under stress, another
recognizable self-portrait. Where we go under stress is never a good place, and
not the side we wish to present to the world, but it’s instructive to how to
handle our baser instincts, and the numbers help us out there, too.
Numerology and astrology, for Chris and me, is much more than a frivolous pastime; it has proved to be a useful strategy that helps us both to maintain a positive outlook.
Numerology and astrology, for Chris and me, is much more than a frivolous pastime; it has proved to be a useful strategy that helps us both to maintain a positive outlook.
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